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Sleeping

by Pentacorn

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1.
We spend our lives in chains Bound by the thoughts of every story Try to make the claims Try to keep it in your body We didn't know the words Tried to sing along and broke it We didn't know our names Wouldn't let us stand alongside them Not all binary Not all clearly black or white Not all binary Not all clearly wrong or right We vaguely understood Didn't know how to speak our truth We didn't care to fall Didn't want to have to lose it all They didn't know the words Tried to sing along and broke it They didn't know our names Wouldn't let us stand alongside them Not all binary Not all clearly black or white Not all binary Not all clearly wrong or right We don't need to conform Don't need to know their rules Don't have to be boys And we don't have to be the girls We can go our way Do whatever we please We're not all binary We don't need to stand alongside them Not all binary Not all clearly black or white Not all binary Not all clearly wrong or right
2.
If I didn't know, If I didn't know If I didn't know better If I didn't know better If I didn't know better If I didn't know better If I didn't know, If I didn't know If I didn't know better I'd say I lost myself If I didn't know better I'd say I'm someone else If I didn't know, If I didn't know You say you'll fight for me You say you're right for me You say you're on my side You say you want me to hide If I didn't know, If I didn't know You keep telling me I'm crazy You want me isolated You want me all alone You keep me medicated And deep inside I know Deep inside I know better If I didn't know better, I'd say I've got to deal If I didn't know better, I'd say I've got to heal If I didn't know, If I didn't know You say I'm going mad I think you're really glad I think you're in in my head I think you'll end up dead If I didn't know, If I didn't know You keep telling me I'm crazy You want me isolated You want me all alone You keep me medicated And deep inside I know Deep inside I know better
3.
Nightmare 04:14
You resent me because I fit in so fluidly, between male and female. Partaking in all but existing in none. I have tits and that’s okay but the hair on my body is distressing. A mouth just for shouting. I’m your nightmare. I choose not to take hormones or change my body, not yet anyway. Binders too claustrophobic, So my pronouns don’t stick. I’m she and her until you decide. I fit into what you see. I’m your nightmare. There’s no pre-approved path for people like me, no medical intervention. So that must mean I don’t exist. If I do male things I’m obviously a man. If I do female things I’m obviously cis. I can’t win with your police. I’m your nightmare. I’m a feminist, a radical one because gender is something I don’t believe. I don’t do effortless in anything Neither man or woman for me. I do what I want and how I want. Just angry and non binary. I’m your nightmare. I accept people for the journey’s they’re on, accept what you can’t see. Trans men are men. Trans women are women. Someone’s identity isn't up to me. I just don’t fit that binary. I’m your nightmare.
4.
The Darkness 05:06
I have all these thoughts; and I'm not sure who's right All I know how to do; is lash out and fight Because the darkness is creeping and it won’t be denied    I build up these walls; around myself and hide Pushing others away; won't let any inside When the demons come calling; they won’t be denied   Hold your breath; try to hide Try not to look; it's the darkness inside    I don't want to hurt anymore I don't want to try I don't want to hurt anymore I just want to die   We all have those feelings and we want to give up We all look to closely at what hurts us the most It's hard to think with all the voices inside And the darkness is calling and can't be denied   Stand up straight; try to fight Don't give in; to the darkness inside   I don't want to look anymore I don't want to cry I don't want to hurt anymore But I don't want to die  
5.
Tonight is the time, night of the witch  The vale is thinnest and the air crisp.  The spirits are calling out from the past  The New Year is dawning, on this night of the witch    Frankincense and myrrh burning on the air  The altar all set for the gifts they shall share  A tear is shed for those that have passed  On this night of remembrance, while it still is dark.   This is night of the witch This is night of the witch This is night of the witch This is night of the witch    For those that have gone before, they gather in the woods  Then they say heartfelt goodbyes,  And they look to the moon  Tonight is Samhain, night of the witch  The vale is thinnest, and the air crisp.  The spirits are calling, out from the past  The New Year is dawning, on this night of the witch  This is night of the witch This is night of the witch This is night of the witch This is night of the witch    For those that have gone before, they gather in the woods  Then they say heartfelt goodbyes,  And they look to the moon    This is night of the witch This is night of the witch This is night of the witch This is night of the witch 
6.
Woman 03:17
Too fat, too thin Doesn't fit the skin she's in Too tall, too short Too average Too ugly, too beautiful Can't trust a pretty face Can't have kids, doesn't want 'em She's letting the side down What gives you the right to say who's a woman? What makes you an authority? Your ideas ain't fuck all baby They mean nothing you see Take a look in the mirror asshole You're the face of the patriarchy Too loud, too proud Makes her thoughts known Too strong, too powerful Makes herself heard She sits astride her white horse Doesn't need a protector Won't believe society's lies She's a defector What gives you the right to say who's a woman? What makes you an authority? Your ideas ain't fuck all baby They mean nothing you see Take a look in the mirror asshole You're the face of the patriarchy You call for solidarity You call for respect But until you see my sisters as people You ain't worth shit
7.
Sleeping 03:52
I'd like to watch you sleeping I'd like to sleep with you I'd like to know what's inside I'd like to know what you hide I'd like to watch you sleeping I'd like to enter your dreams To know what's inside your head When the beast needs to be fed I'm inside you I'll protect you I'll hold the dark back I'm on the inside..... I'd like to watch you sleeping I'd like to hold your hand Down the stairs of your fear Where you make a stand I'd like to watch you sleeping I'd like to offer you a branch A light that outshines the dark To give you power I'm inside you I'll protect you I'll hold the dark back I'm on the inside..... I'd like to watch you sleeping I'm here to hold your sword The page to turn you on I'll row you from that shore

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released March 25, 2017

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Pentacorn Brighton, UK

We don't need to conform
Don't need to know their rules
Don't have to be boys
And we don't have to be the girls

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